Bloke's view: top 5 mistakes women make

After reading my post on Thursday about how “samey” most men’s profiles on RSVP are, my friend D, a successful, attractive, 30-something guy who is also on RSVP (but most definitely doesn’t use the word ladies), sent me his list of the top five mistakes women make in their profiles. In the interests of putting a different viewpoint forward, here they are:

1. Photos. Try to smile. If you look dour, chances are you actually are.

2. Issues and baggage. If you have either, don’t put it in your profile.

3. Shorthand SMS text. If you can’t say it in real words, don’t say it at all.

4. Gym lovers. Sorry but I just don’t believe that you go to the gym five times a week.

5. Glamours (or as I like to call them Mission Impossibles). Why are you on RSVP? You know you can walk into any bar and meet someone, so is this just some fun for you? Or an attempt to get a free dinner?

Ok, so I have to agree with D on the first four points, all of which can just as easily be applied to the male profiles on the site.

Where I have a problem is point number five. Leaving aside whatever personal experiences have led D to include this in a list of “mistakes” (possibly something best discussed over several rounds of caprioskas), I feel that this is a little unfair on the presumably super-attractive women he’s talking about.

It is true that these women could probably meet someone in a bar (let’s face it, it’s not that hard, if you’re female and have a pulse), but not necessarily someone that they have anything in common with or would want to be in a relationship with.

Or they could be in my situation (not that I'm claiming to be a Mission Impossible!) and have a limited number of friends left to go to bars with. Seriously, four out of five of my closest friends (including my whole Friday night crew) have had babies in the last seven months. Even if I could drag them away for a night out, the chances of them wanting to head to a pick-up joint so I can chat to random strangers is extremely small to zero. And you know what? I wouldn’t want to. I may be showing my age but these days an enjoyable bar is one that involves comfy seating, a good wine list and music that’s low enough to chat with friends over.

I’m sure that there probably are some women on RSVP who are just in it for what they can get out of men – a fancy dinner or expensive night in a cocktail bar. Just as there are married men looking for a bit on the side; swingers who need a female companion to gain entrance to sex paries; foot fetishists looking for a mistress to order them about, and married couples interested in a Vicky Cristina Barcelona experience.

The majority of people on the site are however, like both D and myself, there because they’re hoping to meet someone that they’ll click with and fall in love with. They may not in the end be the right person for you but I think you have to give everyone the benefit of the doubt up-front.